Funny

It is funny how we fall in love with something because of it easy access and then after a couple of months the new wears off and we just forget about. For instane this blog was the best thing ever invented. It was a place to vent my feelings because I had no friends to talk to a year ago. Now I have friends and people who actually understand what I am going through. These last couple of months have been weird to say the least. Facebook is now my new best friend because I found a friend I thought I had lost forever and helped me stay in contact with my cousin who I met under the funniest of circumstances. Myspace helped me to connect with family and friends. I have a great church that I love dearly. I do have one problem though that is weighing on my heart and mind daily. That is weather or not I should stay in Tulsa where I finally have friends or move back to Vinita to save money. I know quite a conumdrum. I still don't know what to do. I pray everyday that God will give me the strength to seek his will in every thing. I applyed for some jobs in the Vinita area and if I get them that will be my signal to move home. Please pray for me as I seek his will.

How Awesome is the Almighty!!!!!!!!!!

I just want to Prais the Lord right now. How awesome is his great Love and Compassion. No matter how far we stray or think we have strayed from him he is never to far to pick us up in his arms and just love on us. These last two weeks he has done that for me. He brought an awesome new friend into my life that reminds me how awesome he is. He has led me to a church where I know that I can grow and thrive in him. He has given me awesome people around the world that just believe in me in everything that I do. I LOVE MY ABBA FATHER YAHWEH. He is such an Awesome God that there aren't enough words to describe him. Wonderful, Loving, Almighty and the list just keeps growing. He is my almighty and I will seek after him in all my days.

WHY???????

Okay so yesterday was Martin Luther King Jr Day. My only question is why do you celebrate him but never celebrate some of my heros. There are alot of Native American heros that should be celebrated for what they did and are still doing to make young Native Americans love who they are. What about Sequoyah and the language that he established for the Cherokees? Or Wilma Mankiller who showed young women not only in her tribe but around the states to go after their dreams? What about the many cheifs of all the tribes who worked to keep their tribes together after many trials and tibulations? I just don't understand why the celebrate a man who did do alot for our country but don't even give a second glance to the people who were here long before his people ever came to America. Banks are closed to observer Columbus day. Believe me he wasn't the greatest man to walk the earth. He thought he had actually reached India when he arrived in the New World and yet we recognize him. You do realize that his first trip wasn't his only trip. He came back again and enslaved many of the people that lived in the islands and in Central America. What do you think of your hero Christopher Columbus now? It is a known fact that he wasn't the first European to set foot on the New World. It is a known fact that the Vickings came and established villages long before he came. Why not celebrate the original people along with all the other "heros" we love so much? I bet if our governement ever really looked at history they would see that the Native Americans did contribute alot to America. I may be a little biased considering I am part Cherokee, but I have to be anymore. To keep my culture alive I have to fight for it. I do know that we have a month but do you realize what month that is. It is November and I wonder why it is November. Our children have to listen in school and on television how great and how wonderful the black sommunity is. What about all the other communities. Have we forgotten that America is a melting pot of many different creeds and cultures. February is Black History Month, why, what happened that was so big that they get a whole month. What is sad is if our government were to have a White History month many people would be up in arms about it. That is what our children are always learning, let them learn something else. Maybe I am prejudice and I am proud of who I am, but to be forced to remember people that really mean nothing to my culture isn't right. Don't forget we are a melting pot and the Latinos and the Blacks aren't the only ones that exist in this country!!!!!!

my job is toooooo stressful

I love my job, but I think it is going to kill me because of the stress. I get griped out because a room got cancelled and it wasn't my fault and then because of that I had to walk two of my guests over to our sister hotel just right in front of us. Only one we will have to pay for, but hey that is crazy. This is the first Saturday night in about 2 months that we are overbooked. I wouldn't had to have walked anyone had they not walked one guy in and had they made sure that one room was cleaned yesterday I would be just fine. Oh well. If I get in trouble I will just say it wasn't my fault and I would rather have happy guests than a mad one. And when you have a huge client coming in and they are paying more than the two I am walking over to our sister hotel, I think you would rather have them stay here. I am just glad that this night is almost over. I get off at 11 and it is 9:30. Well I am doing this at work so I am out of here

OH MY

I can't believe that the semester is almost over. Only three more weeks and winter break starts. What is so funny I don't really want it to come. That only means that I have to go back to working on Tuesday mornings and I had gotten used to sleeping in. Oh well. Christmas is almost here and I am getting excited. It is time that I get to spend time with my family. It may be a little cut short because I have to work on Christmas Day, but that is what I get for being unselfish and letting Sara go home for Christmas.

I kinda wish I wouldn't have been. I have been so unselfish at work and what does it get me. They think it gives them the right to walk all over me. I know I should be over this by now, but Monday I got a new revelation on the situation. I guess I should explain what happened. Sundays are supposed to be a day that me and Sara switch. One Sunday she is 7-3 and I am 3-11 and then vice versa the next Sunday. Well Sunday before last I worked 7-3 so that is supposed to mean that last Sunday I was supposed to work 3-11. Well Nicole, our AGM, accidentaly made the schedule wrong. On Saturday when I got to work I reminded Sara that it was her turn and she left in a bad mood. Well about 10:15 that she calls and says that we have to stick with the schedule and that Nicole told her to stick to the schedule. I told her that I was actually looking forward to going to church and she goes I am sorry, but that is what Nicole said. To say the least I was pissed and almost passed out because of my anger. I bitched at my friend and our sercurity guard Mike for about 15 minutes just to calm down. I did what I was told and went to work at 7-3 on Sunday. When Sara came in she didn't say Thank You or anything just that I could work 3-11 3 weeks in a row for all she cared. I went to work on Monday and about 11 or so Nicole asked me what Sara and I had decided about Sunday. I go I worked 7-3 and she goes ok so that means you get 2 weeks in a row 3-11. I go yes. Sara is such a liar and about that time I wanted to come out of my skin. I decided I needed to leave so I took the trash out and just calmed down. I really hate being the adult all the time up at work. But I guess that is what I get. I also get all the crap from the rest of staff if they have done something wrong. I really should talk to Sara about this, but I like not really liking her right now. I know I am a BITCH, but I like it alot so I am not going to change. Well I have class soon and I really need to get off of here to go.

okay

i have decided that some guys aren't worth the time of day. They say they are your friend and then completely blow you off because they are jerks. Okay maybe that isn't what happened, but that is what is seems like. I didn't know he moved here and now that I had a friend here I was excited. Thought we could just go and be friends and hang out. I don't have a thing for him, but I guess he thinks that. Oh well. I just wish I could make him see that I see him as a good friend and that is all. Oh well. I have noticed that if I ignore him long enough he will realize that all I want is a friendship and nothing else.

But other than jerks. I had and interesting week to say the least. On Wednesday, I went up to work to help my friend Linda do something and as I was there the Fire Alarms went off because of a guest opening her door because of burning popcorn. Oh that was interesting. Then today we had the police come in because of some suspicous activity with some guests and come to find out they were doing some very illegal things and one guy was taken out in handcuffs. How interesting!!!!!! That isn't supposed to happen in a 3 star marriott hotel. I worked at a normal hotel for 6 months and nothing like what has happened in the last 5 months ever happpened there. Well except for the manager embezzling from the company, but that is it. But that has been my week so have fun with your weekend

oklahoma city

Ok so I went to Oklahoma City this weekend to see my friends and I loved it!!!! I miss all of them so much, but I am glad that I am home. I got to see everyone but Lance, but that is okay. I did get to see Jason and I couldn't have been more happy. I found out that his church is going to have Big Daddy Weave and I hope to get to go. It is in Feburary and I hope to get to go. I loved being with him and I finally got a picture of him. Okay so it is in my phone so I get to see it all the time. I think I am obsessed with him. Is that healthy?????

I am so sick of being single and going to Edmond this weekend made that feeling worse, but I guess I can get over it. I will admit I don't have time to have a boyfriend, but I am so sick of being single. I wish that I didn't have these feelings, but I will always have them until I am not longer in this state.

One question I have for anyone that reads this is how do you quit feeling the way for a friend and let God? One thing that many of my mentors have told me is if you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans. I know he has wonderful plans for me and I don't know if Jason is part of those plans. Sometimes I do wish God would just go this is the man you are going to marry and this is how many kids you are going to have and here is the job you will have and here is the church you will be at, but as we know it isn't that easy. "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm, plans to give you a hope and a future." If I always remember that, I will be just fine!!!!!